Teaching the lech a lesson
by KawaiiChica
Summary: You know, I never would have believed it but Miroku's lechery certainly came in handy, Kagome giggled again.


Disclaimer: The characters don't belong to me, they belong to Rumiko Takahashi k-? I'm just borrowing them for the story.  
  
Author's Notes: Just another quick one-shot, another attempt at some humor, but with more fluff than my previous humor fic. Hope you like it!  
  
" " Speaking  
[ ] Thoughts  
  
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
  
- _Inuyasha's point of view_ -  
  
"What do you mean you told him we're married?"  
  
I winced, my ears hurting at the sound of Sango's high-pitched squeal. Kagome looked equally surprised, glancing wide-eyed at me beside her. It was raining pretty badly and this was the only inn that still had rooms available.   
  
"We need a place to stay and the inn keeper did not approve of our group until I told him we were married." Miroku explained. "Its just for one night."  
  
"It is pretty cold," Kagome shivered, arms crossed tightly across her chest. I'd given her my haori to protect her from the rain, but her hair was soaked and water dripped down her neck into her shirt. A bolt of lightning flashed through the sky, followed by the rumble of thunder, causing her to jump and move closer to me.  
  
"Feh, the wench is right, Sango just use hiraikotsu to knock him out for the night." Without another word, I draped an arm around Kagome and guided her inside.  
  
With a sly grin, Miroku moved out of the way, allowing for Sango to go ahead of him. We were given two adjacent rooms at the back of the building where the others around us would be empty. The rooms were chilly and damp but would keep us dry which is what mattered. Kagome looked up at me, knowing we'd been given these rooms because of the fact that I'm a hanyou but I ignored her and settled into a corner of our room.  
  
There was a double futon laid out for us, just like one in Sango and Miroku's room. After kicking the houshi out, the girls changed and Kagome soon come back to find me growling at Miroku, who quickly slipped out with a grin and a good night.  
  
[Fucking houshi, as if I'd ever really do any of that shit to Kagome.]  
  
Just the thought of his suggestions had my ears burning and my cheeks heating in an embarrasing blush. Looking at the wall beside me, I was muttering beneath my breath until the warmth cooled. "Damned lecher."   
  
Kagome giggled and gave a nod in agreement while handing over my haori. She was now wearing a pair of her pj thingy's, with a white shirt that had two little pink straps holding it up and a pair of pink pants, "Thank you."  
  
"Sure"   
  
With a shrug, I slipped it back on and looked down at the floor in front of me. Hearing a loud slap followed by Sango's angry voice in the room next door, Kagome rolled her eyes and shuffled over to the futon. Wrapping the blanket around her shoulders, she picked up the small bag she'd had in her back pack and shuffled back over to my side.  
  
To my surprise, she dropped down beside me and leaned her head on my arm. With a yawn, she opened the bag and dumped the contents in her lap. Grabbing a couple of the granola bars, she handed them to me and kept one for herself. Without moving her head from its place, she ate her bar and jumped again at another roll of thunder.  
  
Knowing how frightened she could get during storms, I let her lean on my arm and ate quietly before crumpling up the wrappers and stuffing them into the bag with hers. Glancing down at the girl beside me, I saw she lay with her eyes closed and allowed my features to soften a bit. [Thank kami that Shippo's leg wasn't healed enough for him to come, the damned runt would be all over her because of the storm]  
  
Relaxing a bit, I felt the day's travels catching up to me and was mid-yawn when the door slid open and Miroku peeked in. Stopping in the doorway, he grinned at the sight before him, "Nothing's going to happen eh?"  
  
"Shut up houshi," I warned, furthur annoyed when Kagome pulled away.  
  
"Really Miroku you and your dirty mind," Kagome shook her head at him and stood.  
  
With a shrug, Miroku glanced over to her backpack, "Sango was wondering if you might loan her your music?"  
  
"My cd player? Sure," Making her way over, she dug through her backpack and pulled out the small case with the player. Switching the cds, she handed over the headphones and watched him leave, but not before glancing meaningfully between us.  
  
With an annoyed huff, she shoved him out of the room and slammed the shoji shut behind him, "Dumb hentai."  
  
Chuckling, I moved to lean against the wall opposite the bed where I could watch the storm out the window. Keeping my profile averted from her, I glanced over as she lay down on the futon and settled in, pulling out a book from her backpack and turning on her small booklight to read with.  
  
When a small fire was lit in the room next door, I glanced behind her, watching the figures behind Kagome and figured they'd asked Kirara light the small fire hole in the center of the room. (Like at Kaede's house) Scooting back a little she watched a shadow bend over and hand something to the other before coming over and settling directly in front of the futon. With his head resting against the thin paper wall, we realized he would be able to hear any noise they made, and then she gasped when he turned and pressed closer.  
  
[He actually thinks that something might happen between us!]  
  
Glaring daggers through the wall into the baka, I was about to stand and march over to punch some sense into him when Kagome lay back down on her stomach and went back to reading her book. Seeing that she'd decided not to let it bother her, I sat back with an annoyed shake of my head, looking out the window again before she startled me out of my thoughts with a loud gasp.  
  
"Oh YES!"  
  
Frowning, I turned to look at her and cocked my head sideways. Nothing in her other books ever made her so happy before. Wondering what the heck she could be reading, I was shocked the next second as she gave a giggled and moaned. [What the...?]  
  
"Oh Inu!"  
  
My jaw dropped  
  
[What the fu...?]  
  
To my continued surprise, she moved over on the bed, stopping a scant foot from the wall. In all honesty, I was too stunned and confused to do much except wait and see what the heck was going on.   
  
"Oh yeah... hmm..."  
  
Kagome grinned, and I looked up as the shadow beside the wall turned, obviously moving closer.   
  
[The damned hentai!]  
  
Growling angrily and gripping my fisted claws tightly, I was surprised when Kagome giggled and turned to smile at me before calling out again.  
  
"Yes! Do that again!"  
  
Her voice was slowly gaining in volume and turning huskier, a timbre that was both new and exciting for some reason, a bolt of desire rushing through me at her next moan and her calling my name again.  
  
"Mmm... oh Inu... oh my!"  
  
[What the _hell_ is going on here?!]  
  
Lying back on the futon, Kagome tossed around a bit, making noises with the blankets. The sight of her, hair spread recklessly over the bed, cheeks flushed and eyes alight with laughter, I gulped, growling instinctively as I felt myself getting more and more aroused at the sounds she was making.  
  
I jumped suddenly, realizing I was starting to drool when she began slowly pounding her fists against the futon beneath her. Soft mewls and whimpers were coming from her lips, as well as sighs and murmurs. Behind her, the shadow by the wall was all but pushing through it in their attempts to hear better.   
  
I saw her head turn towards me and she winked, which I repaid with a growl and a glare, hoping it would make her stop whatever madness this was.  
  
"Oh yeah Inu, that's SO sexy! Do that again please?"  
  
Kagome raised her eyes to mine and nervously licked her lips, a bright smile following when I growled again.  
  
"Hmm I love your growling..." Kagome giggled when I did it again, "Do you know how sexy it is when I'm pressed against your back and you growl menacingly at a youkai? The vibrations are so hot and its even better when I'm... mmm... beneath you like this..."  
  
Hearing a muffled groan from the wall behind her, it finally dawned on me what she was doing and I couldn't help but grin.

[Shit Kagome! Miroku must be going mad!]  
  
Moving closer when she sat up and beckoned me over, I turned off the small book light and took a seat beside her. Shaking my head, I saw her turn one way and I quickly turned the other. Sitting back to back so we could both glance over a the wall, I decided to join in and gave another growl, followed by a faked groan.  
  
"Ooo... honey!"  
  
Miroku shifted and we linked hands, my left holding her right.  
  
"You like that huh?" I asked huskily.  
  
Kagome giggled and squeezed my hand, "Oh yeah!"  
  
I growled again, louder and then hit my free hand against the futon in a steady, pounding motion like she had before.  
  
"Oh Inu that's so... oh right there... yes, yes - right THERE!"  
  
Kagome managed a squeak with that and I raised an eyebrow, glancing over my shoulder while keeping up the pounding, wondering how she'd learned to make that sound. She turned her head also and gave me another wink before whispering in my ear to quicken the pace of my pounding.  
  
I did as told, hitting the floor harder and faster as she directed, she was growing louder and increasingly sexier in her moaning and groaning. I found myself groaning every so often also and growling on cue like a good puppy. I wasn't surprised to find myself getting more and more aroused as we went and then she grabbed my hand and stopped it, a long, high-pitched version of my name escaping her lips at that moment.  
  
"IIIIINNUYAA--SSSHAAAA!"  
  
Realizing the effect wouldn't be the same if I didn't reply, I found it easy to call out her name in a groaning tone. Moaning and whimpering a little more softly, Kagome and I were 'cooling down' when the baka in the next room suddenly moved away from the wall and shot out of the room, his feet pounding on the floor as he ran down the hallway and out into the cold, windy storm.  
  
Hearing the innkeeper yelling at him to close the door, Kagome and I promptly burst out laughing. We laughed for what seemed like ages, which felt great since I don't laugh that often, but this was too good not to relish. Eventually we calmed, rolling onto her side, Kagome wrapped her arms around her stomach and struggled to calm her stomach ache. Moving onto my back, I was feeling it also and then we both froze at the sound of the door slowly opening. As Kagome 'eeped' and sat up with a blush on her cheeks, I lifted my head and smiled, seeing Kirara there and shaking her head at us.  
  
Grinning, I looked up when a giggle escaped Kagome's lips, followed by another, and then she dropped back and laughed aloud again, her head resting on my stomach. Looking down into her bright face, I joined her again, both laughing ourselves out this time, until we lay there struggling to catch our breath.   
  
-  
  
- _Third person POV_ -  
  
-  
  
Gaining a hold of himself again, Inuyasha lay there looking up at the ceiling above when the touch of her hands on his gi made him lift his head. Kagome was touching his arms and chest, frowing a bit at the dampness of his shirt but when she looked up they both froze. Her face was so close that their noses were practically touching.   
  
[If I were to turn my head just the tiniest bit to the right I could...]  
  
Inuyasha was brought out of his thoughts when she moved for him. Taking the chance before he could pull back, Kagome angled her head a little and leaned forward to press a kiss to his lips. It was a soft kiss, a girl's kiss, inexperienced and chaste, but soon grew into something more as he wrapped his arms around her and deeped it. Cupping the back of her neck with one hand, Inuyasha angled her head for better access and gently opened his mouth, tugging her lower lip between his teeth. When they opened with a soft gasp, he took advantage of it to slip in his tongue and get a full taste of her.  
  
To say he was addicted would be an understatement. Moaning at the wonder of the soft tongue against his, the tangy and sweet flavor that was uniquely hers, Inuyasha pulled her body over his and lay back, smiling when she brought her hands up and cupped his face, allowing him to move her as he pleased. As if having her body pressed so intimately against his wasn't enough, her hands moved up to rub his ears, eliciting a low, purr-like sound from his chest that even he wasn't aware he could make.  
  
Giggling, she broke off the kiss and looked down into his dazed eyes, her own looking equally foggy and unfocused. Smiling back at her, Inuyasha leaned up to nuzzle her neck, inhaling her intoxicating scent and relishing in the soft moan that she gave. Rubbing his ears again, she giggled and pressed down against him whispering.  
  
"You know, that purring's even sexier than your growls."  
  
Inuyasha chuckled, "So you really meant that?"  
  
"Mm-hmm... sure did," Kagome felt his hands on her back, slipping under her shirt and sighed, crying out softly in surprise when his teeth nipped at her collarbone suddenly. Pushing his head back, she met his gaze again and shook her head with a small frown.

"Bad Inu, no biting!"  
  
"I'll bite anytime I want bitch," Inuyasha smirked, "And there's nothing you can do about it."  
  
"Oh no?" Kagome brought her hands down and lightly raked her nails down his sides. As his eyes widened, she smirked and lowered her head as if to kiss him, but then moved down and nipped at his neck in the same way he had, only a little harder.  
  
Yelping, Inuyasha pulled his hands from her shirt, accidentally scratching her back with one of his nails. Hissing at the sudden scratch, Kagome saw his horrified eyes widen and quickly shook her head, rushing to re-assure him.   
  
"I'm ok! Its just a little scratch!"  
  
"I'm sorry!" Inuyasha quickly sat up with her in his lap, turning her so he could see check damage to her back.  
  
Sliding her hair over her shoulder he saw a small bloodstain on the shirt and cursed. To her shock, he shoved the garment down, Kagome's gasp hardly registering as he saw the long scratch down her spine. Touching it carefully, he was glad to see that it wasn't too deep and sighed in relief.   
  
Closing his eyes, he rested his forehead on her back and sighed, noticing a shiver run through her because of his breath teasing her bare skin. Feeling guilty while he smelled the scent of her blood, he moved instinctively forward and placed his open mouth on the top of her cut.  
  
"Inuyasha!"  
  
Kagome gasped and pulled forward, her arms crossed in front of her to cover her bare chest but his own tightened around her waist and pulled her back against him. Flushing, she closed her eyes and bit back a moan, arching her head back at the exquisite sensations racking through her body.  
  
Inuyasha was incredibly tender, running his tongue lightly, almost hesitantly down along the cut and removing the topmost layer of blood with its scratchy surface. Pulling back for a moment, he built up a good amount of saliva in his mouth, feeling the trembling of her body and inwardly smiling at it. Once he had enough, he pulled her closer and again opened his mouth on her back, covering the cut from top to bottom with the sticky, warm liquid, a low moan reaching his ears as her hands moved down to clutch his.  
  
Lost in the sensual haze he'd created, Inuyasha continued licking her back, gently lapping at it, knowing his saliva would help it heal faster. Raising his hands from where they'd held her waist, he growled softly in approval when they bumped into her unbound breasts. Gently cupping them, he heard her soft mewls and gasps, reveling in the sound, her body pressing closer to his. That soft bottom of hers pushed back, increasing the ache in his hakama as it instinctively rubbed against him.  
  
It wasn't until a familiar voice spoke that their lust-induced fog cleared abruptly and they lifted their heads in shock. Miroku, soaking wet and shivering, groaned and shook his head, wiping a cold bang from his forehead. To their surprise, he suddenly glared at the girl tugging up her shirt.  
  
"If you're going to partake in such activities again in the near future Kagome-sama, kindly bring two of those music players."  
  
Turning to leave, he stopped and raised a hand to the shoji, "And make sure you keep the door closed!"  
  
Slamming it shut and stomping out of the inn, Inuyasha picked up on his mumblings of cold water and damned hanyous and their luck with women. Hearing him chuckle behind her, Kagome turned to see his grin and gave him a frown.  
  
"What's so funny? He just walked in on us and thinks we were going to... you know!" Kagome pouted angrily.  
  
"He already thought we'd done it, remember? You started it," Inuyasha reminded her, leaning back and propping his body up on his elbows.  
  
Kagome sighed, looking down at her lap with a shrug, "That was just a joke to teach him a lesson."  
  
"So what's the difference?" Inuyasha raised a hand and gently traced along her shoulder up to her neck, fingers stroking lightly.  
  
Her breath was shaky when she spoke again, "We didn't really do anything before but just now... I mean you were licking my back!"  
  
"And stroking your breasts," Inuyasha grinned and sat up again, raising his free hand to slide her hair over her back and use the one on her shoulder do pull down her shirt again.   
  
Raising her hands to try and stop him, Kagome found herself trembling when he pressed hot, open-mouth kisses along the side of her neck. Going up to her chin, he followed her jawline and finally lifted his head to seal her lips beneath his in another passionate kiss.  
  
Hands clencthing on his gi, Kagome felt it open, his bare chest coming in slight contact with hers and pushed it open wider, moaning when his hands left her to slip out of the the sleeves. Quickly removing the shirt, Inuyasha tossed it away and wrapped his arms tightly around her back, crushing their half-naked bodies together.  
  
With a mewl, Kagome broke off the kiss and realized suddenly that he'd moved, rolled them over, and she was now looking up at the ceiling above while he nipped and licked his way down along her neck and shoulders. Closing her eyes to enjoy the shocks of pleasure running through her body, she felt Inuyasha kiss a freckle on her neck and smiled.  
  
"If I'd known that teaching Miroku a lesson would have had this effect on you, I would have done it a long time ago," Kagome whispered teasingly.  
  
Raising his head, Inuyasha grinned and placed a brief kiss to her lips, "Maybe you should have done it sooner, then you couldn't have sat me for calling you a bitch like you did yesterday."  
  
That dimmed her smile a little, "I am not a bitch."  
  
Biting her neck, Inuyasha heard her cry out and licked it a little to soothe her. "I'm going to leave a mark right there tonight and then you'll be a bitch."  
  
"No, I am not a bitch," Kagome insisted, smacking his shoulder.  
  
He lifted his eyes and she saw them twinkling mischievously, "Not yet."  
  
Kagome pouted, "Never, not now and not ever."  
  
Hearing him growl, she felt the rumble in his chest against hers and moaned. When he chuckled, she smacked him again and glared up at his smile, "Admit it, you'll be a bitch."  
  
"No"  
  
Thinking of her hands rubbing his ears, Inuyasha made that purring sound again and grinned wider when she moaned, her hands gripped his shoulders tightly.  
  
He smirked and kissed her lips again, "So will you be my bitch?"  
  
Kagome surprised him suddenly by giving a soft sob, tears slipping from her eyes as she opened them and looked up at him. "No Inuyasha I can't accept that, I know its different for you but you have to understand. In my time bitches are mean and nasty, and sometimes they're whores."  
  
Inuyasha froze at that and listened as she went on, "I know its not like that for you but I've been brought up with that concept of a bitch and I feel dirty when you say it to me. I couldn't do this if you really think that I'm..."  
  
"No," Curbing his lust, Inuyasha slid his arms around her back and pulled her close, turning onto his side with her head pillowed on his arm.  
  
"Kami I'm sorry, I knew it bothered you but not why," Inuyasha kissed her temple and sighed, "You said you understand but I don't think you do, not completely Kagome."  
  
Lifting her chin to look her in the eye, he saw the hope in her chocolate orbs and smiled, "I'm a dog demon Kagome, the natural mate for me is a bitch. When I say that you'll be my bitch I mean that you'll be my mate, my partner, if you want you can say my wife. Its all the same, you'll be mine."  
  
"Yours?" Kagome took a second and then beamed, "Your mate?!"  
  
"Hell, you're already my life," Inuyasha admitted.  
  
"But what about..."  
  
"I still have to avenge that part of it," he agreed, shaking his head when she pulled away. "But that'll be settled when we get rid of Naraku, then she'll go back and we'll be free."  
  
"You'll stay with me?" Kagome whispered, hands tightening on his shoulders.  
  
"Always"  
  
"I thought you loved her?"  
  
That made him sigh, his face falling a bit, "I did once, we both know that, but things change. She's changed, I've changed, I don't want to become human for anyone, I want a wife who'll love me as I am. I want someone bubbly and happy, who can argue with me and also bring out the softer side I hide away."  
  
"Sounds familiar," Kagome smiled.  
  
"Sounds perfect"  
  
"I agree and maybe..."  
  
"Maybe?"  
  
"Maybe I'll even learn to like being a bitch."  
  
"Damned right you will!"  
  
Grining, he kissed her again, leaving no chance for discussion as his hands began roaming once more. Feeling her hands slide up and rub his ears again, he purred, eliciting a delighted moan from Kagome.   
  
[Definitely my bitch]  
  
-  
  
Miroku was just returning to his room, hoping to actually get some sleep now, when a high-pitch squeak stopped him halfway inside. Kagome's giggles reached his ears again and he sighed at the ensuing growls.   
  
[What? Does being a hanyou give him extra stamina?!]  
  
"INU!"  
  
Kagome squealed and then gave a breathy moan.   
  
Feeling himself begin to shake, Miroku hurried over to Sango and carefully removed the headphones from her ears. Slipping them over his own, he was fumbling with the player when a shrill scream came from the next room. He was relieved to hear the music begin and cranked the volume dial up as far as it would go.  
  
To his dismay, the cd player was set on random and skipped to a song that didn't necessarily help his situation any.  
  
[Will the torture never stop?]  
  
Lowering his head in defeat, Miroku dropped onto the futon laid out for him and sighed, deciding the song on the cd player was probably less haunting than the sounds coming from the other room. A brief concern flashed through his mind while he listened, [Why in the world is Kagome listening to music like this?]  
  
"I wanna get you in the back seat, windows up, That's the way, you like to fu-"  
  
[Perhaps if I wake Sango...]  
  
Standing, Miroku removed the headphones, grimacing at the steady thumping coming from the other room. Kneeling beside the sleeping taijiya, he hesitated only until another female cry reached his ears, at which he promptly reached out and gave the unexpecting girl's backside a firm squeeze and...  
  
-  
  
"HENTAI!"  
  
-thud-  
  
The scream was loud enough to halt them both for a second and Inuyasha's hearing picked up on a soft, "Thank you" from the houshi before he slumped on the ground unconscious. Chuckling at the man's dilema, Inuyasha's attention was re-captured by the girl beneath him when she pulled her hips back just the tiniest bit.  
  
"No!"  
  
Lowering his mouth to hers for another scorching kiss, they picked up where they left off, forgetting the world around them again easily enough.  
  
In the room next door, Sango stared down at the smiling, unconscious man in confusion.  
  
[What did he mean, thank you?]  
  
A growl, followed by a very feminine, very easily understood moan, quickly enlightened the baffled girl. [Kagome?!] A blush stained her cheeks as she listened to her friend next door. There was no doubt about it, those two were officially together now. And from the sound of it, they wouldn't be stopping any time soon, nor would they be getting any quieter.  
  
[No wonder he's glad to be knocked out!]   
  
Sango glared at the houshi again before another moan reached her ears. Quickly looking around for the music player she spotted it on the other side of the room and went over to put on the headphones. Frowning down at the song it was playing, she squinted and saw the 'repeat' marker was flashing.   
  
[It must have run to the end of the cd while I was asleep.]  
  
Turning off that feature, she started the cd over and smiled when a more soothing song came on. [Much better]  
  
Going back to Miroku's side, she decided to take advantage of his state to make her own move and lay down with her head pillowed on his shoulder, pulling the blanket up over them.   
  
[Kagome's one lucky girl] Sango sighed as another song came on. With the headphones on at top volume to keep the other two's moans and groans from reaching her, she snuggled closer and sang along softly, wishing she hadn't knocked the man beside her on the head so hard.  
  
_I wanna be with you  
If only for a night  
To be the on who's in your arms to hold you tight  
I wanna be with you  
There's nothing more to say  
There's nothing else I want more than to feel this way_  
  
Just as she finished and was about to drift off into sleep, the arm beneath her moved, her body was rolled over, and her lips were captured in a kiss that began tender, and quickly warmed up as she slipped her arms around the man holding her.  
  
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- Early the next morning -  
  
The four friends thanked their host for his hospitality and started on their travels once again. If Kagome's steps were a little hesitant and careful, wincing every so often, no one said anything. When Miroku's hand settled on at the curve of Sango's back, again, nothing was mentioned. It wasn't until they found a spring and Kagome had an argument with Inuyasha, that the previous night was mentioned.  
  
"You certainly _will_ wait around while we bathe, because damnit, its _your_ fault I can barely walk in the first place!"   
  
Kagome's eyes widened and her hand slapped over her mouth immediately after her statement.  
  
The others gawked as well, but Inuyasha quickly got over it, gave a 'feh' and turned away, dragging the monk off somewhere to leave them alone.  
  
"Now that worked," Sango mumbled, then caught her friend's expression and laughed, "Well its not like we all didn't know what went on last night anyways right?"  
  
"Right," Kagome turned and quickly disrobed, sighing deeply once she was fully submerged in the hot water and her muscles had relaxed.   
  
"So you and Inuyasha are mated?" Sango slipped in and gave her a teasing smile.  
  
Kagome nodded, one hand lifting to the mark on her neck, "Hai."  
  
Sitting in companionable silence for a while, she suddenly giggled, and shook her head. Sango frowned a bit before asking, "What's so funny?"  
  
"You know, I never would have believed it but Miroku's lechery certainly came in handy," Kagome giggled again.  
  
"Handy? Just how _'handy'_ was he last night?" Sango asked suspiciously  
  
"Well you see, all I wanted to do was teach him a lesson and..."  
  
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